DIARY

ADDICTED

There was something about him, it was difficult to wrap my head around but whenever I saw him, heard his voice or just thought about him, the whole world stopped, my heart started racing and all I could see was him. A few months ago, while playing a game with me online, he let the fact that he had a girlfriend slip. I congratulated him and we never talked about it again. At some point, it seemed like he had never said it at all but something at the back of my head kept telling me ‘Girl! This dude has a girlfriend and you ain’t no side chick material!’ I didn’t listen to the voice of course, he treated me like there was no other girl in the world and that was enough for me.

I noticed how the heart he used to save my contact would disappear whenever he traveled and appear a few days after he returned but I turned a blind eye. I noticed how he switched off his phone every night while we were cuddling to prevent it from ringing. What I was doing was against all my principles but a voodoo doll representing me must have been locked up in some spiritual cage because my heart was tied. I couldn’t do anything about my feelings, I couldn’t think straight if we weren’t talking, couldn’t function properly if I hadn’t heard his voice. So I stayed.

Photo by Ryan Franco on Unsplash

I was addicted. Addicted to his fragrance, addicted to the sound of his voice, addicted to the feel of his fingers when they brushed ever so gently against my skin. I was addicted to the warmth I felt whenever I was close to him, addicted to the sound of his laughter, addicted to everything about him. I was hurting someone but I couldn’t let go, I wanted him to let me go but he didn’t, I just couldn’t remove myself, I had to be removed.

On my way back from church one Sunday morning, I noticed I had missed a call from a strange number, I called back immediately;

“What kind of a person are you?” A sad lonely voice at the other end asked. “Why would you ever treat your fellow woman this way? What have I ever done to you?” I ended the call, I didn’t need to hear more than this. I could feel the girl’s sorrow and pain. I couldn’t believe that I was the same person who had sworn to never hurt another woman this way, now I was doing it with my eyes wide open.

Photo by Tess on Unsplash

Talking to him would only make things more difficult so I immediately blocked and deleted him on every platform possible. He didn’t need an explanation to know why. It was the hardest thing I had ever done in my life, but I wasn’t going to continue being the monster in someone else’s story.

Author

theorockzz@gmail.com
I am a lawyer and a writer, I specialize in Creative writing(Fiction Short stories and Novels). I'm also a Fashion, Beauty and Lifestyle Blogger.

Comments



Nonye
October 14, 2019 at 6:58 pm

Theo, this is beautiful. Keep doing what you are doing.😘



Pearl
October 14, 2019 at 7:06 pm

Awwwww I feel her pain but it the best. Feels like non fiction





October 15, 2019 at 9:09 am

Nice write up. A woman with a heart of gold could only do that.



Bright Duweni
October 16, 2019 at 10:33 am

The lady in question actually had little or no grip over the guy because he obviously still had someone who he’s truly in love with. I this the lady was just obsessed with him and I give her part of the blame because we can’t tell the heart whom to love.



Scholar
October 16, 2019 at 4:04 pm

Interesting piece



Nwaoha C. Valentine
October 24, 2019 at 10:54 pm

What a disheartening tale. Well, I think you did well by putting a round peg in a round hole via your last action.
Nice one Theodyy



December 15, 2019 at 10:24 pm

Thank you guys very much for all your comments. More stories and articles coming up every month! I love you all!



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